Eating my Words (with a few drops of oil)

I’m not a sellout. I’m not a buy-in. All of my friends and family know it. I don’t do the fancy chef thing, the scrapbooking extravaganza, or the secret panties club. I don’t want the free facial, the extra points or the fancy stick on nails. None of that. I don’t go to parties and I don’t host parties. No ifs. No ands. No buts. So, when one of my good friends began selling (and pushing) essential oils, I stuck to the rules. “No thank you,” I said. I ignored the testimonials, the invites to classes and the firm nudging to “just give it a try, Karla.” I thought, “I’m NOT doing it. I’m not buying in. I will not sellout.” I taught preschool at the time and many of my co-workers bought in, many of the mothers bought in. I stood strong. Admittedly, I truly thought they were all a little bonkers.
Let me digress. I’m a fairly healthy woman in my early forties but I’ve struggled with asthma and allergies (thanks to my daughter’s beloved cat) for years. For years and years, really. I was on a daily regimen of allergy and asthma medications that included, but was not limited to, the following: melt away, immediate relief 12-hour allergy tabs once-a-day, every single day, a morning dose of a decongestant, a daily dose of asthma-preventative medication, a preventative inhaler AND a rescue inhaler. Yet, still, I knew better than to laugh too hard or try to run too far or even to clean too many rooms on a Saturday morning. My adult-onset asthma truly ruled my life.
My youngest daughter has suffered from severe (and I don’t use the word lightly) eczema and psoriasis her entire life. She suffers from constant “itchies” that she struggles to resist scratching. The scratching then, inevitably, creates open sores that are susceptible to a plethora of staff infections. Through her eighteen years, we’ve tried it ALL – every cream sold in the drugstores (both prescription and non-prescription) and many that aren’t sold in drugstores. We’ve tried oral medications and she’s taken her fair share of steroid rounds. In our home, we don’t use scented anything. All detergent, body wash, shampoo and etc is perfume and dye-free. We do not use perfumes, air fresheners, carpet powders or anything that even remotely smells of perfume. Our strict no-perfume rules have helped but the itchy problem has remained a constant presence in our daily family life.
Now, I’ll come full circle, while I was thinking that my “oily” friends and acquaintances were a little crazy, I also refused to sell out and buy in due to our firm “no smelly things” rule. Many tried their pitch. “It’ll help your allergies,” they claimed.  “It’s so good for itchy eczema skin,” they tried to tell me. “Pish,” I thought. How can anything so smelly help my already sensitive allergies OR my daughter’s itchy skin. Smelly things exacerbate the problem, not help it. That’s just crazy talk. I continued to firmly, but politely, decline their sales pitches, offers of samples and invites to educational classes.
Fast forward a year (give or take). I’m suffering from yet ANOTHER sinus infection brought on by an allergy flair after a cleaning spree. I remember feeling miserable and thinking there just has to be a sensible solution. So, in a moment of desperation, I sold out. I messaged a friend that I knew lived a loud and proud oily life. She was more than happy to share her testimony (NOT a sales pitch) with me. Then, I bought in. I purchased a starter kit of Young Living essential oils AND the Young Living Thieves cleaning products kit.
That was five months ago. It’s been quite the educational experience. I’ve learned more than I can share in a single blog post so I’ll keep it short. Please understand that I accept that I’m now one of the crazy-oily people that goes around smelling “funny” and saying things like “Hey, there’s an oil for that.” However, I am not (and most like will NEVER be) a sales person. This is not a sales pitch. Instead, consider this a testimonial of the highlights of my oil journey so far.

·         I no longer take allergy medicine every day. I take it some days here and there, but not every day.

·         I no longer use an inhaler every day. As a matter of fact, I can’t remember the last time I did use it.

·         Our home is alllllllllmost chemical-free (which I believe is the main contributor to bullets one and two).

·         My daughter’s skin looks better than it has looked her entire life. It’s less itchy so she sleeps better and feels better during the days.

The simple truth is that I cannot pinpoint exactly what has benefited us the most; the diffusing of essential oils, the application of particular oils onto our skin or the elimination of chemicals in our home. Truth be told, I don’t really care which it is. I enjoy doing all three and I’ve seen my family benefit from the combination. For us, it’s been an excellent investment. I’m careful, mind you. I do my research. I know more about essential oils, essential oil companies and the toxins and chemicals in everyday household supplies than I ever thought I wanted to know.  My knowledge has only scratched the surface. I learn something new every single day.
I sold out. I bought in. I’m a believer.  I live an oily life. The end.

*Disclaimer*
It gets on my nerves that this is necessary in today's society, but alas...
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A Friendly Rant

Part One: Friendship

Here’s the thing, in my opinion, a person’s FB page is just that…THEIR own personal FB page. They have the freedom to choose who to be friends with, who to unfriend and when, and what to post on their own page. And so do I. I choose my FB friends much like I choose my real-life friends. Wait. As a matter of fact, for me, there is no difference. I am only FB friends with my real–life friends.  They are one in the same. If I wouldn’t stop and speak to you in the grocery store, we aren’t friends…FB or otherwise. You don’t really care about my children or grandchild and why should you? We aren’t friends. We don’t know each other. We may have met once or twice, worked together twenty years ago or have friends in common. But, we aren’t friends. 

I’m often shocked at the friend requests that I receive from random people that I hardly remember. I find myself questioning where I may have known them from. No, we aren’t friends.  I’m also baffled by people that have 500+ FB friends but never seem to be actually talking to any of them. The same five friends respond to their posts and the same 5 friends are included in their pictures. Who are the other 495+ people? Again, that’s completely their choice to be friends with people that they aren’t actually friends with. It just baffles me.

Part Two:  FB Ghosts

Why do some people have a FB page and never post or comment on their “friend’s” posts? That’s not rhetorical. I really do want to know. These silent FB page owners are creepy to me. No judgement intended. I just don’t get it. If you are a FB ghost, please feel free to explain. Surely there’s a perfectly logical explanation. Is it because you want to keep up with your friends from a distance but really have no desire to foster a relationship with them? Is it because you are too shy? Antisocial? Private? Too lazy? Is it because you want to know everyone else’s business (that they willingly post for their “friends” to see) but you don’t want anyone to know yours? Why, please explain, are you FB friends with people you don’t even like to communication with?

Part Three: Solicitation

I wish FB had a front door. You know, so people actually had to knock to come in and so I could hang one of these awesome signs on it, loud and proud!  Ya know, when I open my FB to see what’s going on in the world with my friends, I don’t want to be slammed with marketing ploys. I have been hit up to buy (and sell) Pampered Chef, Mary Kay, Isogenix, Tastefully Simple, Rodan & Fields, and various essential oil companies.  I mean, people that I haven’t seen or been in contact with for years and years have sent me these creepy FB messages about joining their amazing business venture. They most often begin with messages like, “Karla! I saw your mom/sister/dad/daughter the other day. I can’t believe how many years it’s been…” OR, my personal favorite, “I see you’ve returned to your maiden name and assume you’re divorced. I’m sorry. I’d like to help you by introducing you to my company. Here, you can make millions…” or some bull malarkey like that that is then followed by an obvious copy-and-paste sales pitch. Stop it. Seriously. Stop it.  I always resist the urge to reply, “I’m not divorced. My husband died.” That might shut them up. Or maybe not. Here’s a newsflash: I never respond to those messages or accept those friend requests. As a matter of fact, I block them so they can’t find me again. We are not friends. We never were and it is quite obvious that we never will be.
Now, I will say that there are a few of my friends, that I actually keep up with, that use their own FB page to post solicitations for their multi- or mid-level marketing company.
Which, in my opinion, is perfectly acceptable, so long as they don’t harass me. Referring back to Part One. Your page is your page. Solicit away. Maybe I’ll contact you to buy or be educated. Maybe I won’t. Don’t bother me. I won’t bother you. Confession: I’m a Young Living member. I love my oily, (almost) chemical-free life. I love my DIY hair products, cleaning products and bath products. I may post about my love for my oily life but I never solicit using my FB page and I never, ever harass. (Don’t bother waiting for it, there will be no sales pitch in the next paragraph). I signed up to be a member of YLEO’s through a friend. She lives the oiliest life of anyone I’ve ever known. If you meet her, she’ll give testimony and witness but she’s never tried to push me or give me a sales pitch. There is a difference.  She has never called me during the day while I’m at work or in the evening when I’m being a mom to talk to me about “building my business.”  She has never sent me obnoxious, annoying messages or sales pitches via FB messenger.  She doesn’t use her FB page to beg for business and she doesn’t flood her page with nothing but oily this and oily that. She has never bugged me to host a party or teach a class. Fact is, if I want to buy something, I’ll look for a marketing-type FB page, or, Hell, I’ll just go over to Amazon.

Remember, people, friendship is defined as a relationship that involves communication, trust and support. I suppose Webster needs to define Facebook Friendship.  Clearly the two are very different.