A Friendly Rant

Part One: Friendship

Here’s the thing, in my opinion, a person’s FB page is just that…THEIR own personal FB page. They have the freedom to choose who to be friends with, who to unfriend and when, and what to post on their own page. And so do I. I choose my FB friends much like I choose my real-life friends. Wait. As a matter of fact, for me, there is no difference. I am only FB friends with my real–life friends.  They are one in the same. If I wouldn’t stop and speak to you in the grocery store, we aren’t friends…FB or otherwise. You don’t really care about my children or grandchild and why should you? We aren’t friends. We don’t know each other. We may have met once or twice, worked together twenty years ago or have friends in common. But, we aren’t friends. 

I’m often shocked at the friend requests that I receive from random people that I hardly remember. I find myself questioning where I may have known them from. No, we aren’t friends.  I’m also baffled by people that have 500+ FB friends but never seem to be actually talking to any of them. The same five friends respond to their posts and the same 5 friends are included in their pictures. Who are the other 495+ people? Again, that’s completely their choice to be friends with people that they aren’t actually friends with. It just baffles me.

Part Two:  FB Ghosts

Why do some people have a FB page and never post or comment on their “friend’s” posts? That’s not rhetorical. I really do want to know. These silent FB page owners are creepy to me. No judgement intended. I just don’t get it. If you are a FB ghost, please feel free to explain. Surely there’s a perfectly logical explanation. Is it because you want to keep up with your friends from a distance but really have no desire to foster a relationship with them? Is it because you are too shy? Antisocial? Private? Too lazy? Is it because you want to know everyone else’s business (that they willingly post for their “friends” to see) but you don’t want anyone to know yours? Why, please explain, are you FB friends with people you don’t even like to communication with?

Part Three: Solicitation

I wish FB had a front door. You know, so people actually had to knock to come in and so I could hang one of these awesome signs on it, loud and proud!  Ya know, when I open my FB to see what’s going on in the world with my friends, I don’t want to be slammed with marketing ploys. I have been hit up to buy (and sell) Pampered Chef, Mary Kay, Isogenix, Tastefully Simple, Rodan & Fields, and various essential oil companies.  I mean, people that I haven’t seen or been in contact with for years and years have sent me these creepy FB messages about joining their amazing business venture. They most often begin with messages like, “Karla! I saw your mom/sister/dad/daughter the other day. I can’t believe how many years it’s been…” OR, my personal favorite, “I see you’ve returned to your maiden name and assume you’re divorced. I’m sorry. I’d like to help you by introducing you to my company. Here, you can make millions…” or some bull malarkey like that that is then followed by an obvious copy-and-paste sales pitch. Stop it. Seriously. Stop it.  I always resist the urge to reply, “I’m not divorced. My husband died.” That might shut them up. Or maybe not. Here’s a newsflash: I never respond to those messages or accept those friend requests. As a matter of fact, I block them so they can’t find me again. We are not friends. We never were and it is quite obvious that we never will be.
Now, I will say that there are a few of my friends, that I actually keep up with, that use their own FB page to post solicitations for their multi- or mid-level marketing company.
Which, in my opinion, is perfectly acceptable, so long as they don’t harass me. Referring back to Part One. Your page is your page. Solicit away. Maybe I’ll contact you to buy or be educated. Maybe I won’t. Don’t bother me. I won’t bother you. Confession: I’m a Young Living member. I love my oily, (almost) chemical-free life. I love my DIY hair products, cleaning products and bath products. I may post about my love for my oily life but I never solicit using my FB page and I never, ever harass. (Don’t bother waiting for it, there will be no sales pitch in the next paragraph). I signed up to be a member of YLEO’s through a friend. She lives the oiliest life of anyone I’ve ever known. If you meet her, she’ll give testimony and witness but she’s never tried to push me or give me a sales pitch. There is a difference.  She has never called me during the day while I’m at work or in the evening when I’m being a mom to talk to me about “building my business.”  She has never sent me obnoxious, annoying messages or sales pitches via FB messenger.  She doesn’t use her FB page to beg for business and she doesn’t flood her page with nothing but oily this and oily that. She has never bugged me to host a party or teach a class. Fact is, if I want to buy something, I’ll look for a marketing-type FB page, or, Hell, I’ll just go over to Amazon.

Remember, people, friendship is defined as a relationship that involves communication, trust and support. I suppose Webster needs to define Facebook Friendship.  Clearly the two are very different.